Story Day

This is the first of my Story Days. I’ll try to post a new chapter ( or story) every Saturday- or when I feel like it, don’t get your hopes up- So here goes.

The Sordid Tale of Umbrey the Squalid Elf

Umbrey was an elf. He lived under an overturned tuna can in an empty lot in Queens. The rest of his tribe lived in a high rise loft on the upper east side with a view of Central Park. Umbrey had shunned the tribe as being too material; he said he wanted to be an artist and in order to become one he had to live the gritty side of life- his malodorous squalidation made his work Authentic and Real. In fact all of this was a load of crap; in truth Umbrey was antisocial and he lived in the can because he liked the smell. The rest of the tribe was fine with that as long as he kept his tuna-smellin’ backside out of their loft. Umbrey tended to affect property values in a negative way.

Umbrey had one friend, a cockroach named Michael. Even Michael didn’t really like Umbrey though. Michael was trying to travel the path to inner peace and felt that showing charity and friendship to someone like Umbrey was a good way to get there. In this he was wrong;  the only path that Umbrey lead to was dried up tuna flakes and possible tetanus.


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